just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
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