Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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