So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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