you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Randomize
