I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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