420 ftw
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
