craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize