just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Your topless pictures make me question reality
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize