apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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