ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
Say something about gay babies.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I think i got beer on your cat.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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