you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
