I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
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She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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