Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize
