Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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