you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
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