Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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