this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Randomize
