too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize