I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I don't deserve a penis
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
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