How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
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