guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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