If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
