Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I haven't been this sober since birth.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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