FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
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