I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Randomize
