I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
