why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
