do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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