On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
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