..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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