Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
