My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.