my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
