"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize
