What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Randomize
