I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
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I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
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