you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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