it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
