Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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