A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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