Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
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