Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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