you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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