Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
How does one acquire holy water?
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
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