someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
