you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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