why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
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Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
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I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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