So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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