You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
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