We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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